Misguided Ghosts
by capsiclerogers
Summary: "Face it, James, you weren't thinking about anyone but yourself. You did it to help yourself, because it was convenient. It was the easy way out so you took it." KAMES/CARGAN. Rated M for dark themes & language.  James' P.O.V.
1. Prologue

**Omg, trust me I wanted to write the Cargan one so badly, but I had to write this first.  
>This actually is based off of the drama between my best friend &amp; a guy.<br>She was practically best friend with this dude and they liked each other. She said some things she regretted and lost him. Now she's trying to get him back!  
>So yeah... KAMES! First one. Well, I mean, the Cargan story has Kames but this is revolved around Kendall &amp; James. Teehee.<br>This is just the prologue so it kind of sucks, but tell me if you want me to continue...**

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><p>Let me count how long it's been. Hm… four years. Yup, four years since I've seen the love of my life, the bane of my existence. Four years ago, I lost him. How? Easy question, I was a fucking idiot and for that, I'll never forgive myself. Oh, sorry, I forgot to introduce myself. Hi, I'm James and it's nice to meet you. As you can probably gather from the information I just gave you, I play for the same team. No? Fine, I'll say it as plain and simple as I can. I'm gay, happy? Well I hope it doesn't sound like I have something against homosexuality because I <em>don't<em>. It just happened to ruin everything. I'm a klutz and I'm impulsive, my friends say. So maybe it was my fault, but being gay really didn't help. How can falling for your best friend _ever_ have a good outcome? Pft, maybe in stupid fairytales or sappy cliché romance novels, but reality? Never, exactly.

But honestly, enough about the boy, Kendall Knight. I don't want to talk about that. I'm twenty three and my dream of being a superstar died about four years ago. Our band "Big Time Rush" disbanded because of my careless mistakes. I always knew I messed things up, which is most likely the reason why my dad left me when I was three. I know I'm inconsiderate; I've heard it from basically everyone who walked into my life. You know that saying, "History repeats itself" or something? Yeah, that's basically my life. Everyone has walked out on me. Everyone who I cared about deeply left me and took a piece of my heart with them until I was left with nothing. Damn, who would've thought my life basically _revolved_ around this boy. Every horrible thing happened because my love left and you know what that means right? That means it's my fault. All. My. Fucking. Fault. So tell me, how would _you_ carry around a burden like that on your shoulders? Knowing everything you touched, everything you loved, everything you had a special connection is ruined _all because of you_. That's how I feel. Fuck my life. Fuck everything.

Oh right, sorry. I was talking about the present, right? I tend to do that. Seems like everything I begin to say or think about somehow finds its damn way back to… _him_. Okay, sorry anyways. I work at my mom's company. You see, I never went to college and I never got my degree. My own mom refused to give me a high position in her company so right now, I'm just her assistant. You know, pick up the phone, made plans with clienteles, that kind of jazz. My mom runs _a lot _of companies—a record company, cosmetic company, you name it. Since I couldn't live out my dream to be a rich and famous celebrity, I might as well meet some right? So if you couldn't guess, I decided to work for her record company called Diamond Records. I live with my best friend Carlos, who actually became a successful stunt double in a mansion in LA my mom just handed to me. I bet you're wondering about Logan, huh? After all of us went our separate ways, he attended Yale to study pre-law, and is now enrolled in Harvard's med school. Impressive, eh? We still keep in contact, which is good. But the weird thing? No one has heard from Kendall ever since.

How am I? That's nice to ask. I'm fine. I'm great, just dandy. Of course I'm not okay! I never will be. I fucked up _everything_ this time—everything. And I can't change it, I can't take it back, and it's too late to say sorry. I put up this façade for everyone. I seem happy, but I'm not. I can't forgive myself for what I did. I'll never be happy as long as Kendall's out of my life. I destroyed everything. I destroyed my dreams, my friendships. I bet Logan and Carlos secretly hate me. One day, they're going to leave me and I'll be alone, just like how my dad and Kendall left me. And don't tell me I have my mom, because I fucking don't. She doesn't care about me. She just wants me to take over her business. Trust me, I have made many attempts to commit suicide. None of them worked, sadly. They all failed miserably. That one time when I drunk drove, and the _other_ time where I tried to walk off a building—anyways, they didn't work. After those attempts, I wasn't allowed to go anywhere without Carlos with me. It was fucking stupid. It's my life, I can do whatever the hell I wanted. Plus, I'd be doing the world a favor. I didn't do the world any good, and they know. They all know.

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><p>I groan as I push open the huge front door and collapse onto the nearest furniture, which happens to be the dining table. I am exhausted. My fucking mom made me do midnight coffee runs and sort out contracts. I glance at the oven clock. <em>3:47 AM<em>, it reads.

"God damn it," I mutter, slowly sliding off the table.

I groggily haul my tired but perky ass up the stairs and into my bedroom, immediately going for my bed and letting a relaxed sigh as my head hit the soft, fluffy pillow. I am lethargic, and nothing in this universe could make me move. I shut my eyes and drift off into a deep sleep.

I am awoken by a loud sound of shattering glass. I sit up immediately, clutching my head as my starts head spin. I shouldn't have sat up so fast…

"Shit!" I hear someone scream.

_Oh no,_ I inwardly groan, _what the hell did Carlos do now?_ I immediately grab a pair of basketball shorts and a Minnesota Wild hoodie and head downstairs. I see the Latino boy standing in front of a heap of glass shards, looking petrified. He whips his head towards me and his eyes widen by tenfold.

"Ngh~ James!" he nervously says, standing in front of the pile trying to 'block my view.' "Good morning!"

I raise an eyebrow and chuckle. "Good going, Carlitos. It's… 10 AM and you manage to _already _break something. Well, I'm going to go eat breakfast. Want some?"

"Sure," he calls from down the hall as I turn into my kitchen.

I crack some eggs and dump a plate full of chopped up ham onto a greased pan, the contents sizzling as they come in contact with the hot pan. Next to the eggs is another pan, holding a few slices of bacon, crackling and sizzling as I use a spatula to press them down.

"Mm, smells good."

I look over my shoulder to see Carlos taking a seat at the dining table, eyes closed as he breathes in the aroma of James Diamond breakfast. I grin and turn back to the food. When I am done splitting the food, I have two plates in my hands and set it on the table.

"Aw, thanks," Carlos beams, not waiting a moment before he chows down.

I take the empty seat next to him and start on my own plate. I put down my fork and walks to the cupboard to take out two glass cups.

"I'm sorry about the cups," Carlos mumbles, eyes fixed to the deliciousness in front of him. Although he isn't looking at me, I can definitely tell he feels upset about it.

I saunter to the fridge and take out some orange juice, pouring the juice into the two cups. I grab them and walk back to the table, setting one of the cups in front of Carlos.

"Don't worry about it, Carlos," I sigh, not sure why Carlos feels so guilty about breaking a cup. "It's _just _a cup. Speaking of which, did you clean it?"

Carlos nods as he smiles a little, probably relieved to hear that I forgave him. I roll my hazel eyes before giving my undivided attention to my breakfast.

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><p><strong>So the part with breakfast and Carlos probably confused you all.<br>Sorry about that, I kind of wanted to show the relationship between James and Carlos.  
>Basically, James and Carlos are super close and stuff...<br>****So yeah. Logan will either be mentioned or come IN the chapter.  
>Kendall, well, not for one or two chapters maybe. But soon!<br>Review button is looking rather appealing, eh? :D :D :D **


	2. We All Learn To Make Mistakes

**Second chapter. :P  
>Gets more sad... I think.<br>LOGIE COMES TO VISIT, WHEEEE.  
>Enjoy. :)<strong>

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><p>It's our day off and Carlos suggested that we spend it playing video games, so after we finished our breakfast, we slid onto the couch and popped Black Ops into our PS3.<p>

"Let's kick some zombie ass," Carlos says, grinning as he plops down beside me.

I laugh and roll my eyes. "Alright, let's."

Halfway through our intense battle against the living dead, Carlos' phone rings. He groans and quickly glances down to see who is interrupting his gaming session.

"Logan's calling. What should I do?" he asks me, not taking his eyes off of the plasma screen.

I shrugged, still completely focused. "Idunno, let it go to voicemail? Our partners completely ditched us, so it shouldn't be long until we die."

"Way to stay positive," Carlos laughs. "Okay, I'll just call him back later."

I made a correct assumption, because we both die not long after. Carlos sets down his controller and proceeds to call our doctor friend back.

"Hello? Yeah, sorry. We were busy shooting down zombies," he sheepishly chuckles, a pink flush stretching over his skin.

I smile. I know that Carlos has liked Logan for the longest time, but is too afraid to tell him. What surprises me is that Logan is completely oblivious to everything. Carlos is so freaking obvious it's hilarious. Psh, and Logan's supposed to be the smart one.

"You're coming to LA tonight?" Carlos gasps, a small smile forming.

I stare at him intently, waiting for an answer. Logan's coming?

His tiny smile grows into a large one. "Yay! We'll pick you up!"

I pump my fist into the air and mouth a 'yes!' I haven't seen Logan in months, and I really miss him. As Carlos chatters away on his phone, I lean back into the sofa, thinking about how everything had changed so rapidly. We are all on separate paths now, and it's just... weird. I had always known what Logan wanted to be, so I definitely was not surprised when he told us he was going to medical school. I never knew Carlos would amount to anything, in all honesty, but here he is, a successful stunt double. And Kendall? Man, I haven't talked to him in ages. Ever since _that_ happened... I don't know what he's doing right now, and I probably never will. Something tells me he's doing something along the lines of hockey or music. He always had a passion for both hockey and music, and really did not like to choose. Big Time Rush really was not the type of music Kendall wanted to do, but he was willing to give up his dream for me. I sighed quietly and my eyes began to well up with tears. I can't believe I actually messed _all of that_ up. He gave up his dreams _for me_. I must have come off so ungrateful. I snap out of my thoughts when I hear Carlos wrapping up his phone conversation.

"Alright, Logie, I'll see you tonight!" he chirps and ends the call.

He looks at me and immediately frowns. He must have noticed my red eyes.

"Are you okay?" he inquires, scooting closer to me.

I nod and let out a sigh. "Yeah, I'm fine. It's just... I miss him."

Carlos bites his lower lip and looks down at his hands. "I know, James, _I know_. We all do."

"If I could take everything back..." I start, but didn't finish. I let a tear slide down my cheek and brushed it away with my hand.

"James, what happened happened. Don't waste your life dwelling in the past and regretting. You didn't mean to do anything," Carlos consoles, pulling me into his arms. He starts to rub small circles on my back as I sniffle.

"What if I did? What if I meant to break us up because I was selfish and mad? Carlos, you don't know _anything_ about what I did," I finally say, voice breaking.

He releases me and sighs. "James, if you're trying to make me mad at you..."

"I'm not!" I interrupt, screaming. "I'm not _trying_! I'm only telling you the truth. _What if I meant to do what I did_? Would you hate me?"

Carlos didn't say anything; he just shook his head. "James, look, stop thinking. You know what happens when you think. _This_ happens when you think, so please just stop. Leave the thinking to Logan."

I pout and cross my arms against my chest. "There's nothing wrong with my thinking..." I mutter, acting like a child.

"You know that's not what I mean," Carlos sighs. "I don't understand you, James. Why do you try to push people away?"

"What makes you say that?"

"Well for one, you enjoy bringing up the past in a way that makes you seem like the bad guy, like you had evil intentions."

Carlos lists a couple more, but I'm too occupied to listen. I can't help but wonder if he's right. But now I remember: it _was_ my fault. I _did_ have bad intentions and I basically shoved every horrible thing that happened to me all onto poor Kendall. Then I hear Carlos sigh in frustration.

"James, you're not even listening! Jeez, I swear to God..." Carlos mumbles, getting up from his seat.

_Good fucking going, James,_ I think to myself, _even your best friend doesn't want to stay with you. Look at you, so pathetic. You're a horrible person and your "friends" don't even know it. You never told them. You never told them why Kendall left. You never told them what happened. Whenever they ask, you just get mad and leave. Do you honestly think they like you now? _The voice chuckled. _It's all your fault. All. Your. Fucking. Fault. Kendall hates you, Carlos hates you, Logan hates you, even your mom hates you. What do you have in your life now?_

"Shut up! Go away! Stay the hell away from me!" I suddenly outburst, bursting into tears and swatting at an invisible fly near my head. I fall onto the floor and it seems like every emotion that I keep bottled in just all flow out.

I hear footsteps growing louder and a hand pull me up from the ground.

"James? Are you okay?"

I shake my head rapidly, eyes shut tight and tears streaming from my face. What had just happened? I mean, I hear this voice on occasion, but it's never this... harsh. It has always been there, a constant reminder of what I did. This time, it was different.

Carlos sits me down back onto the couch and takes my hand. "James, you know you can tell me anything, right?"

I sort of nod. "T-there was... a voice..." I say in between gasps. "It w-was c-calling me a-all these h-hor-rrible things..."

Carlos pulls me into a hug and whispers, "It'll be okay" over and over again.

"I-I'm scared," I sniffle. "Is there s-something wrong with m-me?"

Carlos only sighs, pulling away. He opens his mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. "I don't know, James. Does this happen... a lot?"

I shrug and bite my lip.

"Look, I know you hate it when Logan or I ask this, but what exactly happened four years ago?"

I immediately look away. I don't want to tell him, can't he understand? If I didn't tell him before, why the hell would I tell him now? I am too upset to yell, so I just refuse to answer. Carlos doesn't need to know. No one needs to know. All they need to know is _it was my fault_. Details are unnecessary.

"Fine, don't tell me, James. Because all I want is to help. Whatever," he grumbles and stomps off.

_Kudos to you James, you manage to piss off the only person who was willing to help you._

I refuse to answer this time. This voice is really beginning to get on my fucking nerves. I don't have the energy to get up and go to my room, so I decide to just sleep on the couch. After all, Carlos is mad at me and won't be bothering me any time soon and Logan's not coming until nighttime. I let my heavy eyelids shut and quickly fall asleep.

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><p>"James."<p>

I turn around and I squint as bright, white lights blind my light eyes. As the light begins to dim down, I see a figure step out, clad in a plaid flannel shirt, skinny jeans, and Vans. What's that on his head, a beanie? My eyes widen as I notice the familiar blonde bangs cascading over this person's forehead. It can't be... He left...

"Kendall?" I try asking, but nothing really comes out. I don't sound like myself either.

"I hate you, you know that?"

I nod quickly. "I know. I'm sorry for everything. I never meant to hurt you."

An evil chuckle escapes from Kendall's lips. "Yeah right. You wanted to hurt me. You're a selfish boy who only cares about yourself, right? Your intentions are less than pure and you'd do whatever to save yourself from pain. You know that, James."

I shake my head. "That's not true. I was trying to help you too," I retort, voice faltering.

"Really? Then why didn't you tell Logan and Carlos, huh? You're scared they'll find out the truth about you, and leave you just like everyone else did in your life. Face it, James, you weren't thinking about anyone but yourself. You did it to help yourself, because it was convenient. It was the easy way out so you took it," he continues.

"No. No! Stop, that's not true!" I am on the verge of tears as I collapse to the ground.

"James!"

What? That definitely isn't Kendall's voice.

"Kendall?" I murmur. I look around and Kendall is no where to be seen. I'm alone in a white room.

"JAMES!"

"Kendall?" I say a little louder.

"JAAAAAMES!"

My eyes flutter open and I see Carlos staring down at me like I grew an extra eye or something.

"What?" I snap as I sit up. "Way to subtly wake me up, ya douche."

"You were having a nightmare..." Carlos informs, still standing.

"How'd you know?" I heard myself ask in a small voice.

"You were screaming 'no!' and Kendall's name repeatedly. Are you sure you're okay?"

I nod and plaster on the best fake smile I could muster. "Never better."

Of course that isn't the truth. The truth had dawned on me a minute ago. I'm slowly getting worse, slowly breaking. The guilt is eating me alive, and I know that. All this pain that I've contained in the last four years is taking its toll on me. I'm not ever going to get better if I continue to be like this. But I just _can't_ open up. I _know_ they'll hate me, everyone will hate me. I can't let them know, _I just can't!_ I'd rather die a slow painful death and burn in hell. But I have to admit I'm scaring myself. I have so many secrets, secrets probably I never knew I know. It's sad. I don't even know myself anymore. I've lied so much in these past years that I'm perfectly content with lying to myself. After a while, it's like I start to believe it. But I also know that if I keep this all to myself, I'm going to explode and breakdown. I can just feel it; it won't be long. Oh well, I can deal with this another time. Until it happens. I'll wing it, like I always do.

"Well, we have to go now. Logan's plane is about to descend," Carlos says, bringing me back to reality.

"Okay," I reply and follow him to the car.

The car ride to LAX is silent and awkward since I'm still a little shaken by the nightmare and Carlos knows I'm touchy about everything. He simply just doesn't want to say the wrong thing. But the silence is killing me so I turn on the radio. It's a song we both know, so we decide to just blast music and sing obnoxiously until we reach the airport. When we reach LAX, Logan is already outside waiting for us. I roll down my window and call his name. His face lights up and a smile forms as he approaches our Audi R8. Yeah, I know, Carlos and his stupid fancy car... Carlos and I step out of the car to give our best friend a hug. I grab his luggage and toss it into the trunk. We all get back into the car and begin our drive home.

"So how have you guys been?" Logan asks from the backseat.

"Good, good," Carlos answers, eyes fixed onto the road ahead of him. "Being a stunt double is like the best freaking job in the world!"

Logan lets out a laugh, and then looks at me. "How's working for Diamond Rec?"

"Eh," I say, shrugging. "Still a lowly assistant, but whatever. How's Harvard?"

"It's great, actually. Fun and challenging. I get to graduate in a year," he says proudly.

I smile. I'm so happy for Logan. He deserves everything he has in life; he works so hard! I know he's going to be a great doctor.

"Well, you better move back to LA after you graduate. LA needs a doctor like you, and we need our friend here with us."

Logan blushes. "Oh shucks, Carlos. I will definitely try my hardest."

Carlos giggles, making me roll my eyes. They are _so_ flirting.

"So, I hate to make this awkward, but I actually heard from Kendall the other night."

My ears perk up as soon as I hear Kendall's name. Carlos side-glances at me, but I'm so used to hiding my emotions my face is unreadable. "Really?"

Logan nods slowly. "Says he misses us. He's trying to make it as a singer with his... friend Dustin."

I lower my gaze as I play with my fingers. I had nothing to say.

"Really, all of us?" Carlos asks.

"Well... he only mentioned you and me, but I'm sure he misses James too." Logan frantically added the last part.

"Doubt it," I finally say.

The tension grew more and more uncomfortable and I turn on the radio again. I swear I could see my friends sigh in relief. We get home at around 10:38 PM and I head straight to bed after exchanging quick "good nights." I lay in my bed, crying softly. It hurt that Kendall didn't mention me, but why would he? He hates me for what I did. Fuck, _I_ hate me for what I did. Finally after an hour of tears spilling, I fall into a deep sleep.

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><p><strong>Yes? No?<br>Haha, I bet you all knew that was a dream... or a nightmare.  
>And I think you can guess which role Dustin plays in Kendall's life...<br>****Review? :D **


	3. Of Broken Hearts and Twisted Minds

**SORRY! This is long overdue.  
>Thank you for the kind ones who reviewed andor have been waiting patiently.  
>But Kendall &amp; Dustin is introduced in this chapter. ;D You'll see what happens...<strong>

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><p>I woke up in the morning, groggy and grumpy. Every little thing seemed to irritate me. I woke up to a dinner table covered with breakfast sausages, pancakes, waffles, and more, courtesy to Logan and his wonderful ability to cook. Carlos and he were just sitting there, beaming while carrying a conversation and it frankly, it irritated me. Why were they so happy when I wasn't?<p>

"What're you guys so happy about?" I huffed, annoyed. I quirked an eyebrow as I sat down and served myself a pancake.

They turned around to look at me, their smiles fading a bit.

"Well good morning to you, cranky face," Logan chuckled, twisting his torso to face me from across the table.

I shrugged and continued eating my breakfast until a phone call _rudely_ interrupted my meal. I grumbled and picked it up, mouth still full. My mom had always told me not to do that, but I don't really give a damn right now.

"Herro?" I walked back to my breakfast and proceeded to stuff my face again.

"James, this is your mother. And please don't eat while I'm talking to you; you know I find that disgusting."

I could practically see her gagging and I rolled my eyes. I swallowed and set my fork down on the plate with a clank.

"Fine, happy?" I grumbled.

"Yes, much. Now I need you to come in, James. I have a big job for you to do."

"Mooooom! You can't be serious! We have a guest here!" I whined, pouting. I heard Logan and Carlos snicker and I kicked them both in the shin. I smiled when I heard them say "ow!"

"A guest?" She sighed. "I guess I should've guessed. You never tell me when we have a guest over at _my_ house."

I scoffed. "Mom, last time I checked, you gave me this house. And it's not like you'll miss it. You have your own house, along with like fifty billion other houses. Plus, the guest is Logan. You know, from BTR? Remember? My friend?"

There was a long pause. "No, I don't recall."

"Hortence?" I tried again.

"Oh, I remember him. You had that pop duo with him right?"

I groaned into the phone and slapped my hand over my face. "Mom, it was a band… group thing. How can—?" I stopped, realizing explaining something like this to her was more useless than telling a rock. "Nevermind."

"Anyways Jamie dear, I need you to come in for an important job. There's a new band I want to sign under Diamond Records and I need you to be their assistant. Make them like it here," she explained.

"Sure, I'll be down in an hour." I was about to hang up until I heard my mom yell my name.

"What?" I groaned all child-like.

"Don't use that tone with me," my mom snapped. "And you don't have an hour. You have twenty minutes."

I gasped and shot up from my seat. "I can't get ready in _twenty minutes_! I need to spend _at least_ twenty minutes on my hair, and I'm not even done showering yet!"

"_James_."

"Fine!"

I angrily slammed the phone down. Carlos and Logan were both looking at me like I was completely insane.

"What…" Carlos pointed at the phone, then back at me. "What just happened?"

I sighed. "I have to go to work."

Without another word, I shot up the stairs and hurriedly showered, got dressed, and sprayed some defrizzing serum before I left for the studio.

I parked my brand new silver Audi R8, something I got for Christmas, into a nearby space and briskly walked into the recording studio. I saw my mom sitting next to the dude who worked the recording stuff—mixers or something—looking extremely content. I'm guessing the band was doing a sound-check demo thing at the moment. I let out a silent annoyed sigh. She was never this happy to hear Big Time Rush…

"Mom?" I tapped her shoulder and she turned around.

"Oh, hi Jamie!" she cooed and stood up, giving me a kiss on my cheek.

"Okay, that's enough," I blurted, blushing as I pushed her away from me.

She smiled and ruffled my hair, which made me yelp as I tried to fix it.

"I didn't have time to dry it! It already looks horrible; don't make it worse!" I complained, smoothing out my hair.

My mom rolled her heavily lined eyes and pointed to a door.

"Go inside and wait. The guys are just finishing up. I'm going to be running a few errands, so just give them water or food or something. _Anything_ they need, okay? Just keep them content while I do some stuff, I'll be back in twenty minutes."

I nodded and she grabbed her purse and ran out the room. I opened the closed door and flung it open, stepping inside before I scanned the room. It was kind of like a lounge, just with a guitar, a set of electronic drums, and a keyboard. There was a big red couch leaning against the single black wall and huge bean-bag chairs plopped in the middle of the small room. The instruments were neatly lined up next to one of the two white walls. I took a seat on one of the bean bag chairs to wait for the band. I pulled out my iPhone from my black skinny jeans and shot a text to Carlos.

**To: Carlos Garcia**

**From: James Diamond**

**hey the house is still intact rite? like u didn't manage to burn down the entire house? :)**

**To: James Diamond**

**From: Carlos Garcia**

**hahaha naaaah. :P its still standing, bro, dun worry. logie's been keeping me company. ;)**

I crinkled my nose and snickered.

**To: Carlos Garcia**

**From: James Diamond**

**ewww ok i so didn't need that mental pic…**

**To: James Diamond**

**From: Carlos Garcia**

**;)**

Before I could reply, the door flung open and I quickly stuffed my phone back into my pockets. I couldn't be rude or else my mom would have my head. A dude with glasses and dark, longish locks walked in, strumming a chord on his (beautiful) acoustic guitar.

"Hey, how does sound?" he asked his band-mate, who was probably behind him.

He suddenly stopped at the doorway and started singing something, fingers running through the metal strings.

"Dude I like it," a second voice said.

_Wait… where did I hear that voice before?_ I shook my thoughts away and stepped up. The guy seemed to notice because he smiles and pushed his glasses further up his nose and advanced towards me.

"Hi, I'm Dustin Belt," he greeted, taking my hand firmly and shaking it.

"It's nice to meet you. My name is James. You guys sounded really—"

"James Diamond?" the second voice asked harshly.

I furrowed my eyebrows. "Uh, yeah, I'm Brooke's son?"

I gasped when the mystery man came into plain sight. He was unmistakable. His dirty blonde hair, his piercing green eyes, that grey beanie he was always obsessed with, those extremely tight jeans, his plaid shirt, and his Vans—it was all too real. "Kendall?"

He looked pretty much the same. The only thing different was he had a bit of stubble, which I thought was really hot. But how the fuck did this happen?

"Yeah," he chuckled, coming off as bitter to me. "I should've known. It _is_ your mom's label. Just never assumed you'd work here as an assistant or something."

He stepped closer, as if he was analyzing me. I felt even more self-conscious now that the love of my life was staring at me. My hair was horrendous and ugh!

"How could my mom not have known it was you…?" I mumbled to myself. I always knew she didn't pay much attention to me or my friends, but seriously? I stayed with his mom for years in L.A. But then again, she thought Logan and I were a pop duo.

"You two know each other?"

I turned to face Dustin, confused etched in his face.

"We're, uh," Kendall started, but stopped to ponder for a moment. His green eyes were staring intently at the ceiling, as if an explanation was going to fall out of the sky. He snapped and focused his gaze on Dustin again. "Old buddies."

_Ha! Buddies… Right, more like fuck buddies. _I thought to myself.

There was nothing but silence for the next twenty seconds, and I thought I was going to go crazy. Thankfully, Dustin broke the silence with a whistle.

"Wow, this is really awkward," he nervously said, taking a seat on the couch and picking up his guitar again.

"Oh, where are my manners? Um, would you guys like something to drink?" I asked, realizing I wasn't doing my job.

"Two cokes, please," Dustin requested, not even looking up.

I raised an eyebrow. "Two?"

He ceased his guitar playing to look up at me.

"See, it's kind of a ritual for Kendy and me," he explained. "It's like, our good luck drink. It's worked every single time. When we landed our first major gig, when your mom's record company wanted to sign us, when Kendall agreed to go on a date with me, when he said 'yes' in being my boyfriend, and—"

"Whoa! So how about the drinks?" Kendall blurted nervously, eyes widened.

It was too late. I had already heard Dustin. I coughed and choked on my spit. _What? Date? Boyfriend? What? _I kept coughing and choking, face turning extremely red as Dustin darted off the couch to pat me on the back.

"Dude are you okay?" he inquired, concerned, after I was sort of back to normal.

I nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine. So coke?" I asked weakly, flashing a fake, small smile.

He shook his head. "No, don't worry about it. I don't want you killing yourself over coke, alright?"

_Damn it,_ I inwardly groaned, _I can't hate him. He's __**nice**__._

I shakily got on my feet. "Don't worry about me. Two cokes coming up."

I stumbled towards the door, refusing to look over my shoulder. I can't believe Kendall and him are, like, a thing. Come to think of it, I remember Logan saying something about a 'friend' of Kendall's. I opened the mini fridge and grabbed two cans of coke before slamming it shut and walking back into the room. I tossed the cokes to the two boys, popping the cans open in sync and then clinking it before taking a sip.

"Ahh~" they both sigh, smiling.

_I think I'm gonna hurl._ I was going to text Carlos to tune them out, but before I could, there was a knock on the door.

"Dustin? Can you help me with something here? I'm not sure if you want me to enhance this part or just leave it alone."

It was the guy working the recording machines. Dustin laid his guitar on the carpeted floor before running out of the room. _Great. More awkwardness._ I looked at Kendall, who looked like he was close to crapping his pants.

"So…" I said, trying to ease the tension.

Kendall glared at me, slowly shaking his head. "Don't talk to me."

I sighed. "Kendall, can I just—"

"No."

I grumbled and crossed my arms across my chest, staring at everything but the blonde.

"Please?" I quickly blurted. I was now literally on my knees, begging for him to hear me out. I had a small pout on and my hands were clasped together below my chin.

His green eyes flickered with annoyance. "I don't want to know what you have to say, James. You lost your chance."

"Kendall, I never meant to hurt you. I was stupid and ignorant."

That was a lie. I had intended to hurt him, but I swore to myself it was for a good reason. I just didn't want him to waste time on me. But that was then. I needed him more than ever, now, and he was out of my reach. Tears were blurring my vision now as I started to cry uncontrollably. Great, how am I going to explain this to Dustin or anyone else who's probably going to walk in the room like right now?

He stood up and dropped his phone on the floor, eyes now clouding with anger. His eyebrows were pushed together and he looked like he was going to hit me. I cowered and closed my eyes, waiting for his hand to come in contact with my beautiful face. I peered out of one eye and realized he was sitting back down again, eyes now showing hurt.

"That's not an excuse," he said softly, unable to make eye contact.

I nodded frantically. "I know it's not. I want to make it up to you. I… I still l-love you, Kendall." I swallowed at the lump forming in my throat. I was literally shaking and my voice was nowhere near stable. It's weird. I always act so tough on the exterior, like nothing can faze me. But when I'm with Kendall, he can make me crumble and feel like nothing within a second. Maybe it was because I was nervous, or maybe it was because I knew I didn't deserve it.

"No you don't!" he shouted, fury definitely returning into his emerald orbs. "God, I'm sick of your lies, James! Aren't you _ever_ tired of lying? I thought what happened four years ago has made you stop."

I was dumbfounded, just plain speechless. "I'm not lying, Kendall."

"Just shut up. There's nothing you did to me in the last four years that showed you love me. The only thing you've managed to do is push everyone away; the only thing you're fucking capable of doing."

My eyes fell to the ground as I made another fail attempt to rid of that stupid lump that had formed in my throat. Kendall knew to never use that card. He of all people knew that I was sensitive about that. I wanted to punch him and tell him I hated him and I never wanted to see him again, but there were two things wrong with that. First, I didn't hate him. I loved him. Second of all, I knew I deserved this. This was just karma. I had put this upon myself; this just proves how worthless I truly was. Tears continued to shamelessly make their way down my face.

"Yo, I'm back!" Dustin announced, skipping towards the sofa. Then he noticed I was crying and Kendall looked furious. "Whoa… what happened here?"

"Nothing," I muttered and stormed out of the room.

I heard Dustin call after me, but I couldn't take it anymore. Everything was coming back to me, something that I've been trying to keep out. Of course there wasn't a day when I _didn't_ think about Kendall, but at least I could usually repress the emotions. I usually tried to focus on the good memories and not dwell on the bad. But now, everything came rushing back, more vivid than ever before. I could _reenact _the entire thing if I wanted to. I stormed out of the recording studio, bumping into my mother halfway out the door.

"Whoa, James! What's wrong?"

I heard her high heels clacking behind me getting increasingly louder until I felt her hand pull me to a stop.

"Mom, how could you?" I whispered, turning around to face her.

She was clearly confused. Her perfectly plucked eyebrows were furrowed and her lipstick covered lips were parted slightly. She put a hand on her hip.

"What are you talking about, honey?" Her voice was soft and gentle, which made me angrier.

"You brought Kendall back into my life again!" I was screaming now, not holding back a single tear, a single emotion.

Her thickly lined eyes widened as the sudden realization hit her like a ton of bricks.

"That's Kendall Knight!"

I rolled my eyes and scoffed.

"No, Mom, it's Logan Mitchell," I sarcastically retorted. "Yes, it's Kendall Knight! I can't… handle being around him. He manages to always break down the wall I built around myself. When I'm with him, I feel so weak and not in control. I hate it, Mom!"

She was silent for a while, as if processing all the words that just spewed out of my mouth like a motherfucking erupting volcano.

"I'm sorry, that completely left my mind," she finally sighed and dropped her gaze to my Converses. "Just… take the rest of the day off sweetie. Hang out with Logan and Carlos, okay? Take it easy. I'm sorry."

I raised an eyebrow and nodded slowly. "…Okay. Thanks."

She gave me a small smile and turned around on her heels and into the building. I stood there for a moment in disbelief; my mom is usually never this nice to me. I thought she would've been like, "James, I'm not paying you to mend things with Kendall and make small talk. I'm paying you to do your job and assist, so suck it up and take it like a man."

"Hm," I thought aloud and began to walk towards my Audi. I'll have to tell Carlos and Logan all about this when I get home.

* * *

><p><strong>I had a lot of trouble with this chapter, idk why...<br>Well hope you enjoyed it! :)  
>Review if you'd like! They're very much appreciated. 3 <strong>


	4. And There's No One Road

**Hey guys!  
>It's a short update, but I think it's important. :)<br>This is written in Kendall's perspective.  
>Enjoy!<strong>

* * *

><p>Today was weird on so many levels. Like a terrible weird. Just my luck to see the one guy I hated most on my supposed-to-be happiest day, right? Here I was, starting a new life and James just <em>waltz<em> into my life again! Now I feels like everything I've done in the past four years trying to leave the past really was all for nothing. And Dustin must be so suspicious right now. It won't be long before he starts to ask questions, and I'm not even sure if I can answer them. I'm just so conflicted. I still can't forgive James, like ever. But when I saw him again, it's like everything I've been suppressing for years just came back. James is an emotional roller coaster that I just can't be on anymore. I've finally moved on and I need it to stay that way. However, knowing James, I know that he's not going to give up without a fight.

"So… do you want to talk about it?"

I sighed.

"Not really, Dustin. I'm really not ready."

My boyfriend leaned forward on the leather couch of our apartment and stared directly in my eyes. I'm guessing he was trying to find out how I feel because apparently, and I quote, "eyes are the windows to your soul." And yes, it's just as corny as it sounds.

I blinked rapidly and he grumbled.

"Stop blinking!" he huffed and leaned back again.

"What are you even trying to do?" I asked, even though I already knew the answer.

He rolled his eyes.

"I'm trying to see what you're feeling," he replied.

"You really want to know what I'm feeling? Upset, _obviously_," I scoffed, getting to my feet and pouring myself a glass of water.

He stood up as well and crossed his arms.

"Kendall, don't be taking this out on me. I don't know who the hell James is and how you know him, so if you just tell me, maybe I can help!"

I slammed my glass of water down and glared at Dustin.

"I don't need help. There is _nothing_ you can do to help me. James and I… we had a lot of history, and it's just a lot to take in," I confessed. "And I'm sorry. I never meant to snap."

He nodded and approached me, giving me a hug and a kiss on my head.

"Look, babe, it's going to be okay," he comforted, taking my hand in his and squeezing it. "Whatever he did to you, it's all over. It's in the past, and it should remain in the past. Focus on your future now. We're signed as a band _together_, and _we're together_. That's all that should matter."

I made a small nod.

"You're right," I said, taking a deep breath. "To the future."

He grinned and leaned in for a kiss on the lip this time.

"I'm going to shower now," Dustin announced, heading for our bathroom. "Wanna join?"

He gave me a seductive wink but I shook my head no.

"I have to take care of something."

I pulled out my phone and dialed a number before putting the phone to my ear.

"Hello?"

"Hey Logan, it's me Kendall."

"Kendall! Hey! How are you? I miss you!" Logan chirped.

I managed a weak smile. Just hearing my best friend so mirthful was a relieving contrast with how my day went.

Before you lecture me, I know I haven't acted like a great friend. I practically had just ditched them in LA and cut off all communication with them, but I had my reasons. I really had to drop everything from the past or else I don't know what I would've done. Probably cave from all the stress and heartache and done something I would've regretted. But I had always promised myself I'll gradually let Logan and Carlos back into my life once I was sure I had my emotions in check.

"I miss you too," I admitted, sighing with relief. "I'm so glad to hear your voice; you have no idea."

The brainiac playfully scoffed.

"Are you kidding me, Kendall? _I_ missed your voice! I haven't heard from you in, like, centuries. Well, besides last week."

I chuckled.

"Yeah, I know. I'm really sorry," I apologized, suddenly feeling guilt bubble in the pit of my stomach.

Logan let out a small sigh.

"Kendall, it's totally fine. The past few years have not been kind to you, and I just want you to be happy, even if it doesn't involve me in your life," he said. "Don't think for a second that I didn't _want_ to call you, because I did. So badly it hurt. I wanted to see how my best friend was doing, and maybe tell him how much I'm enjoying pre-med. But I knew you were unstable, and I didn't want to throw out whatever progress you had made then just from one stupid phone call."

I smiled as I listened to Logan's gracious words. He never failed to make me smile—never. Not even once.

"Thanks, Logie, for being so understanding," I finally said, voice shaking a little bit. I was so touched.

He laughed lightly.

"No problem Kendall. So where are you and Dustin right now? Headlining an international tour and making big bucks?" my friend joshed.

"Man, you know it!" I joked back. "Last night, I was at this club and this _nobody_ tried to talk to me. Can you fucking believe that, Logie?"

Logan giggled.

"No way!" he squealed, feigning disbelief.

I laughed.

"But all joking aside, we're actually in LA right now." I exclaimed, unconsciously pumping my fist in the air.

"Oh my God, me too!" Logan excitedly asked.

I gasped.

"No way! You didn't tell me!"

"Well, you didn't tell me!" he countered. "What are you here for?"

"Dustin and I got signed!" I beamed.

"Hold up, I _have_ to see you in person. I might just die from Kendall withdrawal symptoms."

I cracked a smile and replied, "Sure, I'll pick you up. Where are you staying?"

"At Ja—" A pause and a cough. "Carlos' house."

Too late. I knew what he was about to say. I swallowed thickly and cleared my throat a couple of times before I continued.

"Um, okay, that's okay. I'll pick you up?" I questioned, voice fighting to sound confident.

Logan let out a nervous chuckle that sounded more like a bleat.

"Sure. I'll be waiting outside so you don't… have to… yeah. Um, bye," he blurted and hung up immediately.

I hit the 'end call' button and sighed, taking a swig from the glass of water in front of me. Did James not tell them they had run into each other? I mean, it's been a good few hours since he ran out of the room and never came back.

"Hey, who were you talking to on the phone?"

I turned my head and saw Dustin standing near the couch, drying his hair with a towel.

"My best friend, Logan," I replied. "We're meeting up right now. I haven't seen him in years."

Hearing that come out of my mouth was a weird feeling. Like, everything about those sentences. To say 'my best friend Logan' and 'we're meeting up now' is just odd. I haven't said that in so long and it feels great to have the ability to say that again.

"I'm glad to hear, Kendall," he beamed. "Do you need a ride or anything?"

"Nah, I'm going to take the car alright?"

I fetched the car keys from the counter and slipped it into my pocket.

"Sure," he said nonchalantly. "Not like I'm gonna be going anywhere.

I chuckled at his comment and ran up to him to give him a kiss.

"I'll see you later, hon," I quickly said and ran out the door.

The last thing I heard was a 'bye, babe' before the apartment door clicked shut.

* * *

><p>"Hey, hop in."<p>

I motioned Logan to jump into my convertible without opening the door, but being the practical man he was, he refused.

"Or," he suggested, "I can use the door like a normal person."

I rolled my eyes behind my sunglasses.

"Whatever, Logie."

He laughed.

"Same old Kendall," the brunette sighed. "You haven't aged a bit."

I stuck my tongue out at him and shifted the transmission from 'park' to 'drive' before vrooming away towards downtown LA. We parked in a public parking garage and walked the short distance to a small café all four of us used love. We chose to sit in our usual seats, which was in a booth near the back of the room where it was much quieter and held a different ambience than the seats in the front.

I noticed Logan chuckling to himself as he scanned the menu. I'm not sure why we're even looking at the menu right now. We practically know the menu by memory and we already know what we're going to order.

"What?" I inquired, nudging his leg with my foot.

He looked up and a crooked smile stretched across his face.

"Nothing," he laughed. "It's just crazy. After this whole incident, here we are, four years later, eating at the restaurant we used to eat at. How did you not forget about me?"

"Please," I scoffed, rolling my eyes. "That's ridiculous. We're best friends, Logie. You and me for life."

A content smile made its way on the smaller boy's face before setting down the menu.

"Why are we even looking at this?" he muttered, raising his hand for our waiter to come take our orders. "We order the same damn thing every time.

I laughed heartily and chucked my straw wrapper at him. He teasingly chucked it back at me and we broke out into fits of giggles. It seriously felt just like old times again.

* * *

><p><strong>This was a nice chapter to type!<br>No angst. :P  
>But next chapter, it's back to James' point of view,<br>and James is filled with angst!  
>Leave a review! :) Or not. I don't know, it's up to you!<br>But they are appreciated!**

**And by the way, for the people who have Twitters,  
>I actually made a new Twitter dedicated to Carlos Pena &amp; BTR!<br>Follow at iheartcarlosp and I'll follow you back.  
>Or not. Like I always say, it's up to you, lol. :P <strong>


	5. Someone To Rely On

**So I thought about it, and rewrote it.  
>I actually have somewhere to go now. :)<br>Don't get too attached to Jett, I might make him a bad person. ;D**

* * *

><p>I didn't exactly drive home immediately. I needed to blow some steam off until I was ready to go back home and face reality and talk to Carlitos about it. So I drove down the only place I knew I belonged: the Hollywood Walk of Fame.<p>

With my hand on my steering wheel, cruising smoothly down the street, I laughed silently to myself while I turned up my radio. No, I wasn't crazy, if that's what you're thinking. I thought it was funny that ever since I was a little boy, I promised myself that one day, I'd get my own star. Or maybe a handprint in the cement in front of the Chinese Theatre along with the cast of Harry Potter series and Shirley Temple. But twenty years later, I'm still the same old, unsuccessful James. Perhaps the only difference was that my dreams have died years ago. And to think I was _this close_, too. I sighed. But that was then, and this is now. There's this quote that I really love. It's from a book, I think. "But because things change. And friends leave. And life doesn't stop for anybody." It's a great quote, especially since it applies to my life so perfectly.

I decided I had to take a walk down the endless line of stars in the sidewalk. It always seems to calm me down, seeing all of my idols' names engraved into the ground. I hate how everybody thinks I'm so shallow because I care about pop culture. So what? That doesn't define me. So what if I'd rather hear how Lindsey Lohan screwed up for the nth time instead of the latest world news? It doesn't make me a bad person, or a dumb one. I pulled into an empty space and got out of my car. I pushed my aviators higher on my nose and began to walk along the sidewalk. It was a nice feeling to be strolling down a Hollywood landmark that I loved so much and just bask in the rays of the sun. Right then and there, I felt untouchable. Nothing could transcend how I felt at that exact moment.

I got near the Chinese Theater and smiled as I took in the sight of many people in costumes. Dozens of tourists were waiting to get their picture taken with Batman and kids were screaming at the sight of the Joker. I was scanning around the area when I saw a huge crowd huddled near the celebrity handprints.

"Hello LA, I'm Trisha Barring. I'm here at the Chinese Theater where young Hollywood actor, Jett Stetson, is preparing to make history. In just a few minutes, Stetson will be adding to the famed collection of celebrity handprints with his own," the lady in the red dress informed to the camera labeled "Channel 5 News Cam 1" in messy handwriting.

Unbelievable. Jett was making fucking history. I'm better than Jett. I'm hotter, I'm nicer, and clearly, I'm a lot smarter. I don't think he's ever said anything smart. Like, not even once. I'm surprised he can write his own damn name.

Jett turns to the rolling cameras and flashes his "Jett smile."

"Hello, my adoring fans," he greeted pompously, winking before turning to Trisha. "And _hello, sweet thing._"

Trisha giggled and returned to facing the cameras, holding up her microphone.

"Hi, Jett! So tell me, how do you feel right now?"

She held the microphone up to the arrogant actor's face.

"I feel great!" he exclaimed. "I'm so thankful for all the support my fans have given me. Of course, I'm also thankful for my friends and family too."

The crowd broke into applause. _What suckers!_ I rolled my eyes and brushed a stray brown strand from my face. Some security guards pushed the audience back a little as they all watched Jett intently. The actor bent down and pushed his hands into the wet cement, causing the crowd to cheer wildly again. He finished by writing his name in with his index finger and the date before standing up and starting to leave and sign autographs.

I made up my mind that I had enough of this and began to head back in the direction of my car. Stupid pig is famous and living his dream while I'm working as an assistant that I kind of owned! Well it was under my family's name! I was going to inherit it one day… right?

"Well well well, if it isn't James Diamond."

That stentorian and arrogant voice from behind me was unmistakably Jett's.

I spun around and met with a cocky grin.

"Jett," I said through gritted teeth.

"Did you watch all that? You know, me making history and all? It's no big deal, really."

I narrowed my eyes and laughed dryly.

"Riiiiight, no big deal," I scoffed. "Look Jett, if you're trying to make me feel bad, it's working alright? But I'm seriously _not_ in the mood right now. You can fuck with me another day."

The blonde shook with laughter.

"No thanks, I have a boyfriend. And yes, he _is_ better looking than you, so why would I fuck you?"

I growled and was about to lunge for him until I remembered I was in public and people were starting to crowd around and watch him make a scene. I cleared my throat and relaxed myself.

"I don't need anything else to make my day worse," I calmly stated. "Now if you'll excuse me."

I swiveled around again and continued my journey to my car. I heard footsteps behind me growing louder, but figured I'd just ignore them.

"Wait, James, I'm sorry."

I suddenly jolted to a halt, turning around to face the blonde. I pushed my brows together and opened my mouth multiple times to say something.

"Did you just apologize?" I finally managed, not believing the entire situation. Today was really unreal, and not in a good way.

Jett nodded slowly, an eyebrow raised. "Uh, yes? Did you not hear me?"

I blinked once. Twice.

"Well, it's just you never apologize to anyone," I replied, still doubtful I heard correctly.

He rolled his blue eyes.

"James, I'm twenty four," he snorted. "I've matured."

I shrugged. "Could've fooled me. You're still really cocky, you know?"

He exhaled and chortled lightly. "Well you can't change everything, right?"

A small smile formed on my face and I laughed along.

"I guess," I sighed.

There was a bit of awkward silence, but it was quickly broken. For some reason, I kind of wanted to know more about his life. I mean if you look at the facts, him and I weren't so different. We could get along right? Come to think of it, the only reason I hated him so much was because Kendall hated him. Yeah, his huge ego bothered me, but there was no real reason to _hate_ this guy.

"You know, I'm really proud of you," I decided, nudging the actor a bit with my elbow. "You have a handprint! I have to say I'm quite jealous."

"Thanks!" Jett genuinely beamed and gave me a friendly pat on the shoulder. "And just so you know, you're extremely talented."

My lips curled into a huge grin. "You really think so?"

He nodded. "I secretly liked Big Time Rush's music to be perfectly honest. I just didn't want Kendork to know. You were all talented, especially you."

I know I should've cringed at the drop of my love's name, but "Kendork" made it a lot easier for me.

Laughing, I answered, "Thanks. That's the nicest thing I've heard in a while."

"Don't take this the wrong way, but I can tell you're not your usual self."

I lifted an eyebrow. "How?"

"Your eyes look worn out and tired, like you haven't had a good sleep in days," Jett pointed out. "And your skin is lackluster."

_Wow, big word._

I laughed bitterly. "Life hasn't exactly been treating me nicely. It's been against me since the day I was born. Well, that's another long, boring story you probably aren't interested in."

"Do you want to talk over some coffee?" Jett suggested.

I stared at him, stunned at his offer. "S-sure. Like a date?"

He did an eye-roll. "Don't flatter yourself, Diamond. Like a _friendly_ hangout."

"U-um, okay," I stuttered. _Well that wasn't awkward._

I led him to my car and we both got in. I drove him to the closest Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf. We both ordered lattes and took a table situated next to the window.

"Hey, I don't mean to pry or make you uncomfortable, but what happened to Big Time Rush?"

I didn't know how to answer that. It was kind of personal, and I don't like talking about it. I stared at my coffee biting my lip nervously. Jett poked me in the shoulder.

"Everybody in my life has left me, except for Carlos and Logan," I gushed, not realizing how much I was going to reveal to my ex-enemy. Or frenemy. Or whatever Jett is. "My dad left my mom and me when I was really young. I don't know why, but it must've been something I did. And it's like that set off a train reaction or something. My mom became distant and practically left me to fend for myself, saying that what happens if one day she's gone too. I wouldn't be able to care for myself."

Jett shot me a sympathetic look, slightly pouting. He nodded for me to continue.

"And then everything started to fall apart. The more I pretended everything was okay, the more it wasn't. The pressure really set in and I was crumbling. You know, the publicity, my producer telling me I sounded like crap, the intense dance routines I couldn't get right when everyone else could—that kind of stuff."

Then I bit my tongue. I wasn't sure if I should continue talking. I was unsure if Jett would keep this confidential and listen with an open mind or use this to torment him. In the back of my mind, I knew that Jett wouldn't dare. He can be an ass sometimes, but not a horrible person with no morals and a conscience.

He laid his hand on my shoulder and delivered a tiny squeeze. "Hey, you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

"I do though," I grumbled. "I mean, to a certain extent."

"Alright," he said. "Go on."

I took a deep breath before I ensued. "And then there were the feelings I couldn't control. I had feelings for one person almost the entire time I knew him."

Jett interjected with a chuckle. "I so knew you were gay."

I rolled my eyes and threw my crumpled up napkin at him. "Shut up. Anyway, as I was saying, I had feelings for him and vice versa. Things got out of hand, as I'd put it, and I just messed up really bad. He left and BTR went bye-bye."

Before he had the chance to say something, I held out my hand. "And no, I will not elaborate. It's something I can't tell anyone."

Jett remained silent, fingers under his chin as he thought.

"Well will you tell me who?" he finally asked.

I shook my head and took a sip from my paper cup.

"Can I guess?" Jett tried.

I thought about it. _Sigh, why not?_

"Alright, but I won't say yes or no," I concluded.

"Kendall?" Jett almost replied immediately.

I squinted my eyes. "What makes you say that?"

"It is, isn't it?" Jett asked victoriously. "HA! I knew it!"

I huffed. "Fine, was it that obvious?"

He nodded enthusiastically and blithely punched me on the shoulder.

"Yes," he confirmed, laughing. "So what's up with you and Kendall now?"

"Uh, not great. Don't really talk to him or see him. Although when I do, it's glaring and the occasional arguing," I admitted. "We left things the way they were. It's beyond repair now."

"No it's not," he countered. "It's never beyond repair. You just have to try and try."

I looked at him like he was crazy.

He groaned when he noticed I wasn't catching on.

"James, the thing about you is you're too scared of failure. You get less and less motivated each time. However, if you want to be successful, you have to use the failure as motivation and learn from it. That's how I became famous. You don't take no for an answer."

"But you don't understand! You don't know what I did."

Jett rolled his eyes and leaned back into his chair.

"I don't have to. You're sorry for what you did, right? You would take it back?"

"I _can't_," I reminded. "You can't change the past."

"But you can make up for it. We all learn to make mistakes, but does that mean humans should never get a second chance?"

I reluctantly shook my head. This guy was damn convincing.

"Exactly. It applies to your situation too. If Kendall is really your friend and you both love each other—friends or more, doesn't matter—than you'll find a way to apologize and own up to your actions and he'll find a way to forgive you. If you guys keep running away from it, it's just going to get worse."

"So what do you think I should do?"

"Find a way to let him know you're really sorry," Jett instructed. "You have to think of this yourself."

"He won't even talk to me," I retorted. "And honestly, Jett, I'm not sure if I even forgive myself."

"James, this is your biggest flaw," Jett bluntly delivered. "You need to realize you're not a perfect human being. Whatever you did, did you mean to hurt Kendall the way you did?"

I took a moment to think about it.

"Yes and no?"

Jett blinked at me, confused. "What does that mean?"

"It's complicated. I didn't mean to hurt him that much though. What started out as well-intentioned quickly turned out for the worse and it got out of hand, is what I'm trying to say."

"See? There we go. James, I know you regret what you did, but I think you've suffered quite enough. You deserve to forgive yourself."

I heaved a sigh. "I don't know, Jett…"

He looked at his cell phone to check the time. "Look, I gotta go shoot for my new movie, so you're just going to have to trust me on this, okay? Please?"

I nodded. "Alright."

He smiled in return. "You still have my number right? I want you to call me when you decide on what you're going to do. Or if you just need someone to talk to. You don't need to tell me anything personal, but I don't want you to do something stupid, like attempt suicide or something. When you're sad, mad, or confused, call me up and I'll distract you."

I was seriously grateful. Jett had turned out to be a really nice person. We both got up and pushed in our seats as we left the coffee shop.

"Need a lift?" I offered, pointing to my car.

He politely refused. "It's fine, I'll call my driver."

I nodded and opened the car door. As I was sliding in, I turned to him one last time.

"Thanks, Jett, by the way. If you wanted to know, I _did_ try to commit suicide. A total of five times."

Jett was a little caught off-guard, but he gave me a thumbs-up.

"Not a problem, old buddy. And I'm sorry for the way I came off earlier today. I guess I just associate you with Kendall and the way I used to act just to piss him off. Take care okay?"

I laughed and nodded. I think this was the start of a beautiful friendship.

* * *

><p><strong>I hoped you like that better!<br>There shall be twists as the story advances.  
>Leave a review!<br>**

**By the way, the quote that James quoted from a book is "The Perks of Being A Wallflower."  
>I'm obsessed with that book, and they have some really beautiful quotes.<br>You might see a couple of them here and there. :) **


	6. See, I'm Trying to Find My Place

**This chapter was a pain to write, since it's a transition/filler chapter.  
>But I wanted to incorporate Jett into this story.<br>So yeah... enjoy!  
>Oh, and first part is James' P.o.V.<br>I know, I know, don't scold me for that.  
>But I wanted to move this along and writing separate chapters will be a BORE. <strong>

* * *

><p>"So where the hell have you been?"<p>

I laughed at Carlos' tone of voice. He sounded like my mom.

"I've been..." I looked up, thinking of what to say. "Out, I guess."

He gave me a quizzical look, arms crossed and neck craning forward, as if telling me to spill more details.

"...With someone," I added.

"With who?" he pushed, groaning with annoyance.  
>"With someone," I repeated, obviously eluding the question. "Where's Logan?"<p>

"Out with Kendall," the Latino said, falling on the couch. "Did you know he was back in LA?"

"I, uh, I've heard," I lied.

He scrunched his eyebrows and looked me while lying down on the sofa.

"Really? Who told you?"

"Actually," I sighed, sitting down next to his head, "that's what I have to tell you about."

He sat up cautiously, staring at me with his eyes narrowed.

"What's going on, buddy?"

I told him everything that happened in the studio that day: how the band my mom signed _happened_ to be Kendall and his stupid boyfriend that I can't hate because he was so nice, how I ran out shortly afterwards and almost cried, and how I ran into Jett in Hollywood and chatted about life over a cup of coffee. Carlos watched me the whole time, eyebrows quirked and his big, brown eyes impossibly huge. I couldn't blame him; shit just got real today.

"Wow," he finally said. "That was… some serious stuff."

I nodded slowly. "It was crazy. Who knew? Four years after the breakup, we all happen to sort of reunite in a way."

My friend snorted. "And what do you suppose that means?"

I looked at Carlos questioningly, and he looked at me.

"I don't know, does it even mean anything?" I wondered aloud. "I mean, is this fate telling us to seize the opportunity and fix the wounds we had left open?"

The shorter exhaled a short breath and chuckled to himself before admitting, "I'd hope so. I miss us, you know? Still to this day, I think about what if Big Time Rush had worked. I really wouldn't have minded being a pop star."

My lips curled into a frown as I was overcame by guilt. I know Carlos hadn't blamed me, but everyone knows that BTR split because of my relationship with Kendall. Well, and in secrecy, what _I_ did to ruin it. I was interrupted out of my thoughts when Carlos placed his hand gently on my shoulder.

"Hey, I didn't mean it that way," he softly said, sending me a reassuring look. "I have never blamed you for anything. It didn't work out and that was it."

_Yeah, that was it,_ I scoffed to myself.

I swallowed my thoughts and put on my best James Diamond smile.

"I know, Carlos," I managed, choking out the words.

He gave me two pats on my arm before reaching for the remote on the clear coffee table and powering the TV on with a push of a button.

**~*LINEBREAKLINEBREAKLINEBREAK*~**

I had a nightmare that night. I didn't really remember it, but all I knew was that it was scary. I woke up with a start, beads of sweat covering my tantastic face. I lifted my head up, blinking away sleep as I glanced around the room. I was in the living room.

_Huh, odd_.

I grabbed my cell phone out of my pocket to check the time. It was 4:54 AM and I had a new text from Logan from three hours ago. I tapped "read more."

**To: James  
>From: Logan<br>Hey brosky! Kendall's in LA rn, so I'm staying at Kendall's house tonight. I know, I know, I'll explain tomorrow. Please don't hate me too much. :( Love you and Carlos!**

I let the back of my head hit the sofa cushion and sighed. I was sleeping on a lumpy couch with no pillow or anything, and frankly, I was too damn sleepy to get up. What a dilemma. And apparently, Carlos left to go to sleep without me. Fucking bastard. I blindly searched for a throw pillow and put it under my head. Not the best, but it'll work for now.

* * *

><p>I was awaken with the sound of my front door closing and feet shuffling.<p>

"James? Carlos? Is anyone even here?"

"I'm in the living room," I called out, voice still raspy from not being entirely awake.

"Whoa, what are you doing sleeping here?" Logan chuckled.

I glared at him and launched the throw pillow I used for the remainder of the morning. I missed by a mile and he snickered mockingly.

I huffed and turned to face the back of the couch. "I'll get you later."

He plopped down next to me and flicked my cheek. "Get up, you lazy ass. It's already noon."

"Mm…" I mumbled, not really caring what the smart boy was saying.

"Come on, I'll take you and Carlos out to lunch," he suggested, shaking my shoulder.

"Mm…" I didn't move.

Logan grumbled. "Fine, I'll just throw away all your Cuda products and—"

I practically leapt off the sofa. I ran my fingers through my untamed bedhead and pulled down my rising t-shirt. "Alright, I'm up, God damn it!"

He laughed amusingly and slapped my boxer-clad butt, earning an annoyed squeal from me.

"Go shower and change. I'll go find Carlos."

"Yeah, yeah." I rolled my eyes as I sluggishly made my way up the stairs.

* * *

><p>After I showered and did the usual morning procedures, I went downstairs to find Carlos leaving for work. He told us the director called him in to do some last minute stunts and couldn't join us for lunch, so Logan and I went alone. I drove him to a local pizzeria that I absolutely loved and ordered a pizza for us.<p>

"So why were you on the couch?" he asked, sinking his teeth into a slice of cheese pizza.

"I fell asleep watching TV with Carlos, and that little fucker decided not to wake me up and leave me there," I replied, taking a sip from my cup of Pepsi.

He laughed and shook his head. "You and Carlos are so immature."

I jokingly rolled my eyes and laughed along.

I began to say something, but paused. Finally, I asked, "So how's um… you know?"

The brunette in front of me sent me a confused look, before gasping. "Oh! Um, he's good I guess."

"So what did you guys talk about?"

"Well, I told him about med school and he told me about how he and his friend Dustin got signed by a major label. That kind of stuff," he answered.

I let my eyes wander as I picked up my slice and bit into it. I chewed it thoroughly before swallowing and continuing with my inquiries.

"Did he mention who this _Dustin_ is, or which label he was signed to?" I curiously proceeded, quirking an eyebrow each time I glanced up.

The med student chuckled nervously. "Are you okay, James?"

"No," I said, honestly but flippantly. "Did he tell you _anything_ that happened?"

It came out harsher than I intended.

"What are you trying to say? My _best friend_ is hiding something from me?" Logan unexpectedly snapped. "And what do you know, James? Last time I checked, you haven't talked to him in years."

I choked back the tears that were threatening to spill and fixed my composure before replying.

"I'm _not_ saying anything like that," I said through gritted teeth, murdering him with my glare. "You didn't have to say that."

Logan sighed. "I'm sorry James. I didn't mean to snap at you."

"Nevermind that. All I'm saying is Kendall didn't give you the whole story."

The nerd leaned back into the chair and threw his napkin on the table, clearing his throat before giving me a look to carry on. "Then what is the whole story?"

"Kendall and Dustin were signed to my mom's label, Diamond Records as Heffron Drive. That's why I had no idea I was going to be assisting them when my mom called me in two days ago. Obviously, I found out it was them, and I also discovered who Dustin _really_ is," I explained.

Logan refused to meet my eyes; he was just staring at his plate, occasionally nodding to signal he was still listening.

"We were left alone for one moment and—"

"You didn't… do anything with Kendall right?" Logan interrupted, eyes widened.

I grumbled. "No, Logan, we didn't. Please stop interrupting."

The shorter nodded an apology.

"We fought," I continued. "And I left."

There was a bit of awkward silence.

"Logan," I suddenly said, voice shaking. "Why didn't you tell me about Dustin?"

He let out an exasperated sigh and looked me in the eyes, his big brown eyes carrying guilt. "I didn't know how. I didn't want to hurt you."

"Hey, what we had four years ago ended—terribly might I add—and he's free to date whomever he wants. We obviously didn't work out," I responded.

"James, you can't fool me. I can tell you still love Kendall."

I stared at him in shock. And I thought I was doing such a good job of hiding it. I thought only Carlos knew.

"H-how—" I stammered, pointing wildly with my index finger. "When—HUH?"

Logan smirked and rolled his eyes. "Oh come on, James. I've known you for so long. You're good at lying, I'll give you that, but _no one_ can hide something so big."

I let out a defeated breath and chuckled. "Well, you got me, Logan."

He flashed me a grin and reached for another piece of pizza.

"So I bumped into Jett today."

The shorter was about to put the pizza into his mouth, but stopped and placed it gently on his plate. "Really, and how did that go?"

"It went surprisingly good, actually."

"Well," he corrected. "And Jett? I hardly believe so."

"He has changed, Logan. Matured."

"People don't just randomly change in four years; it's impossible."

I rolled my eyes. "I like to be optimistic, Logan, and I trust him."

"Well I like to be realistic, James, and it's Jett we're talking about. Just… just be careful okay?"

"Fine," I grumbled.

Hmph, well I didn't need Logan's approval to be Jett's friend anyways. He had proven himself to me by giving me some advice and being a good listener when Carlos wasn't here, and that's enough for me. I decided that I wasn't going to dwell on the subject of Jett because Logan was being Mr. Undies-In-A-Bunch.

* * *

><p><span>Logan's P.o.V.<span>

James and Jett? That's odd, because James despised Jett while we were at the Palm Woods. I can't say I'm _too_ surprised, though. They always did have quite a bit in common. But I guess James hated Jett because Jett was an asshole to Kendall. I'm still hazy on that entire situation. How James and Kendall broke up and everything. They wouldn't tell me anything and it was beginning to get to me. How can my two best friends be keeping such huge secrets from Carlos and me? I don't know, I guess I'm just tired of assuming what happened. Obviously something big must've happened, because Kendall and James used to make up—snap!—just like that. I honestly can't believe I don't know. I'm supposed to be the observant and smart one, so why can't I figure out what went wrong? There had to be signs during the entire situation.

However, that's not the point. Back onto the subject of Jett, I never liked him. James was better than him in every way. Not just physically, but James was smarter and in general a better person than Jett was, and I'm not just saying this because he's my friend. I can read Jett like an open book: the classic, selfish braggart with an ego big enough to fill up Gustavo's mansion. He was conniving and refused to do anything unless it somehow helped him. That's why I didn't trust him. People like this don't turn into perfect people in the duration of four years. James should know this; he's smarter than this. I just don't understand why he can't see this now.

And now that I think about it, what is Jett trying to get out of James? Obviously there is something, because he's like that. Maybe I should pay Jett a visit myself…

I was interrupted out of my thoughts when my phone buzzed. I admit, I was a bit thankful because the tension between James and me was getting unbearable.

**To: Logan  
>From: Kendall<br>hey logie, r u free rn?**

I quickly typed back a reply.

**To: Kendall  
>From: Logan<br>No, but I will be. I'll call you soon. I need to talk to you.**

"Hey, I gotta go somewhere soon," I announced, checking my watch.

"Sure, where you going?"

I rubbed the back of my neck. Damn you, nervous tendencies!

"If you're going to see Kendall, you don't have to lie," he sighed, crossing his arms.

"I don't want to make you feel like I'm ditching you," I admitted.

"You're not," James assured. "Don't worry about it, okay?"

I nodded and slapped ten dollars onto the table. However, he handed it back to me.

"Lunch is on me," he insisted, smiling. "Now go."

I shook my head. "Oh no, I couldn't."

"Shut up and go, Logan," he joked, "before I tell Carlos about your diary entry from four years ago…"

My face reddened as I slapped his arm. "Don't!"

He chuckled. "Relax, I'm kidding."

I huffed and grabbed my jacket. "I'll see you later tonight, alright?"

"Sure," he said.

And without another word, I left. The whole situation with Jett still bothered me, and Kendall needed to know about it. I know that they're not talking anymore, but Kendall knows how Jett is, and James will only listen to Kendall. Yeah, my plan probably won't work, but I had to at least try. Finger's crossed!

* * *

><p><strong>Yeah, yeah, the end was craptastic.<br>Okay, anyways now I can move along with the story.  
>Do you believe that Jett's changed from the previous chapter, or do you think Logan's right? And what do you think Jett's trying to gain from James? And finally, what do you think happened between James and Kendall? :D<br>I just want to see what you guys come up with, and see who gets it right!  
>Oh and last but not least, I know a lot of you hate KoganJarlos, but I have a new story idea.  
>I'm not going to start it any time soon, at least not until I finish my other KoganJarlos, but I'm debating.  
>Should it be JarlosKogan, Jagan/Kenlos, or another Kames/Cargan?**

**Here's the summary:  
><em>Song-fic of Spotlight (Oh Nostalgia) by Patrick Stump. BTR splits and James goes solo. However, he loses touch with the ground without the help of his buddies as Hollywood makes him into another manufactured pop star.<em>**

**Thanks for reading guys!  
>Love you. :) <strong>


	7. The Ones We Trusted the Most

**Lalala, hello guys!  
>So yay, I updated haha.<br>It's kind of a short chapter, and it's in Logan's P.o.V.  
>But shit's about to go down!<strong>

* * *

><p>I knocked three times before the painted white door swung open and revealed the tall blonde in the doorway. I waved and smiled before stepping in and taking my shoes off. He closed the door with a small click and led me to the sofa. I scanned around the apartment. The walls were white, and the living room was fairly empty. There was a bunch of cardboard boxed stacked in a pile around a leather sofa, an oak coffee table, and a TV.<p>

"Want anything to drink?" Kendall asked, swiftly walking to his mini fridge and pulling out two beers.

I shrugged and stretched my hand out to grab the glass bottle from my friend. I watched as he flung himself onto the couch and nudged his head.

"Sit."

I complied and snagged a seat next to him.

"Where's Dustin?" I asked.

"Out," he said nonchalantly. "I think he went to buy groceries."

I nodded slightly and continued to stare at the coffee table.

"So what did you want to talk to me about?" he asked, sitting up and leaning forward.

"Um," I nervously began, pulling at my neck hole of my navy striped sweater. "Some stuff concerning…"

One of his eyebrows shot up as he awaited me to carry on. He gesticulated for me to go on.

"Concerning…" I gulped uneasily and glanced at him awkwardly. "James."

He stiffened and cleared his throat before taking a deep sigh. "What about him?"

_Crap! I didn't think this through yet. How the hell was I supposed to know that Kendall was going to respond to me?_

"Uh, he told me you bumped into each other at his mom's record company," I blurted, desperately searching my brain for a way to tell him what I really wanted to tell him. "And you two fought."

He shrugged and dropped his eyes to the beer bottle. "Sure."

This deserved an eye-roll. "Sure? What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means sure."

I sighed. So I got him talking, but it doesn't mean he's going to say much.

I passed my hand through my face. "Okay, well, fine. And guess who he bumped into afterwards?"

"Oh Logie, let me guess!" Kendall eagerly exclaimed, then put on an exaggerated thinking face. "Oh! **I don't care**. Now can we _please_ stop talking about _him_?"

"Kendall, it's been _four years_!" I wailed, eyebrows drawn together in annoyance. "Please talk to him, or talk to me about him! What could he have possibly done that makes it _so hard_ for either of you to tell your best friends?"

The green-eyed blonde opened his mouth to say something, but I stuck my finger up, making it clear that I wasn't finished.

"Honestly, I'm a bit hurt. You guys have been hiding this huge secret from us for four fucking years, and Carlos and I have been nothing but patient with you both. We both really believed you and James would trust us enough and tell us eventually. And we both even agreed that even if you guys never told us, but made up, we wouldn't even mind."

I sighed. "What I'm trying to say is I miss hanging out with you, James, and Carlos _together_, just like old times. I feel like whenever I hang out with James, I'm like cheating on you and going behind your back. I can't deal with this okay? _I miss us all together._"

I don't know when this happened, but tears were pouring down my face like a rainstorm. I broke into a sob and buried my wet face into my hands. I felt a hand awkwardly rub my back. Kendall wasn't great at comforting but at least he was being nice about it.

"I'm sorry, Logan," he mumbled. "If you really want to know what happened… I'll tell you."

I looked up at him, rubbing my eyes and sniffling my nose a couple of times. "Really? And everything?"

He grudgingly nodded and steadied his trembling arms by holding onto his thighs.

"So four years ago, James—"

The door slammed shut and a man clad in tight skinny jeans and glasses moseyed in with numerous bags of food.

"I'm back!"

He turned around to face the couch and jumped a foot when he saw me.

"Who's this?" he asked, pointing."

Kendall got up and pulled his shirt down. "This is my best friend, Logan. Logan, this is my boyfriend Dustin."

I smiled politely and stood up to shake his hand. "Hi, it's nice to meet you."

"Pleasure's all mine," he returned, a huge smile plastered onto his face. "Kendall tells me a lot about you. He was so excited to see you."

I whirled around to see a blushing Kendall. I chuckled.

"What! I haven't seen you in so long…" the tallest murmured, barely audible and took his seat again.

I turned back to face his boyfriend. "He has mentioned you in a lot of our conversations too. It's nice to finally see who this famous Dustin Belt is!"

Dustin grinned and walked over to his boyfriend for a kiss. I felt uneasy. I knew for sure that Kendall was still in love with James, even if Kendall wouldn't admit it. Whenever I mentioned James, jewnicorns, or diamonds, he would get all defensive and a wall would just shoot up out of nowhere. And it wasn't just a "I hate him so never talk about him again" cringe, it was a "he hurt me and I don't want to be reminded that I still love him" kind of cringe. Did Dustin know about James at all? Ha, yeah right. Kendall never talked about his past. He thought the past belonged in the, well, past. Too bad the past haunts you forever.

"Alright, go put the groceries in the fridge babe," Kendall pulled away, laughing as he smacked Dustin's ass lightly.

The dark haired boy winked and headed towards the kitchen.

I stared at Kendall, eyebrows raised. "Was the smack _really_ necessary?"

He stuck his tongue out at me teasingly. "Get over it."

"Does he know about what happened between you and James?" I curiously inquired.

His eyes widened by tenfold. "No! Don't ever mention that to him okay? He doesn't need to know."

"He does if he's your boyfriend, Kendall," I sighed. I really felt like I was talking to some fourteen year old who didn't know how relationships functioned. "The past _always_ finds its way back to the present you know."

He rolled his eyes. "Please, Logan. Go philosophize it up somewhere else."

"I mean it," I pressed. "Look, I don't want to beat around the bush anymore. I came to you with a problem, and I need your help."

He shrugged. "Okay, then say it."

I exhaled and closed my eyes. "James ran into Jett, and now James is convinced Jett has changed and is his friend. Do you agree or disagree that Jett is a changed man?"

The blonde groaned. "Is there a 'I don't give a fuck about James' option? Because I really don't."

"Liar," I accusingly remarked, crossing my arms. "You are still in love with him. In fact, so much it pains you doesn't it? And yet you're here dating Dustin pretending you feel the same way. You know Kendall, I—"

"SHUT UP," he gritted out, glaring at me now. "I fucking hate James, and if you're going to mention him, I have to ask you to leave."

I laughed mockingly. "Look, Kendall, I hate to fight with you; I really do. But you are making this so hard. I don't care if you're not friends with James, but right now, a man you care about is possibly in the process of being fucked over by a scheming egomaniac and you're standing here _pretending_ as if you're unfazed by this whole situation? Bull. Shit."

His whole face darkened and I swore he looked like he wanted to punch me before he finally managed, "Jett can do whatever the fuck he wants with James. Logan, maybe you should leave."

"Fine," I simply said and began to head for the door. I spun around one last time. "Kendall, James needs your help. You know he'll only listen to you. It's always been like this. He's stubborn, but for some reason, only you can get to him. If you truly don't care, then fine. Watch Jett take advantage of James, whatever it is he wants. But if you do, do something about it. You don't even have to talk to James. Talk to Jett and find out what he wants."

Kendall didn't say anything and continued to gaze at the floor, emotionless. So I took that as a cue and left the apartment. As soon as the door shut, I ran my fingers through my hair and sighed. The small glimpse of hope that Kendall would help the situation had left the second I stepped out the door. Damn him and his stubbornness. It was tiring to deal with at times like these. So I pulled out my phone and dialed a number.

"Jett, this is Logan Mitchell," I said. "We need to talk about something. Meet me at the coffee shop? Great. See you soon."

* * *

><p><strong>Damn, Kendall. Stubborn much?<br>And what do you think Logan's going to do when he meets up with Jett? Cuss him out? Be manipulated by Jett? Befriend Jett?  
><strong>**We'll find out next time on 'Misguided Ghosts!'**

**Wow, I'm lame. Anyway, I'm not sure if "Is This Real?" or "I Don't Know Ya" will be updated next.  
>We'll see. :D Reviews are appreciated~. <strong>


	8. Would Someone Care to Classify?

**Another short update!  
>I know, I'm gone for forever and I only give short chapters...<br>I promise, though, shit's going down ohkay? In the next chapter, Hurricane Drama blows the everything up.**

* * *

><p><span>Logan's P.o.V.<span>

"So what did you want to talk to me about?"

Jett sounded impatient and I wanted to kick him in the nuts so hard all his unborn babies would die. But that would deem me a murderer, at least in my conscience.

"Maybe I wanted to chat with an old friend."

I nonchalantly sipped my coffee and set it down gently, never taking my eyes off of the arrogant brunette that was there before me.

He scoffed at my ridiculous statement, which didn't surprise me at all. If I were him, I'd be laughing too. Old friends? Hardly.

"You're still as funny as your face, Mitchell," he sighed, taking a moment to pause from his laughter.

I rolled my eyes. "Nothing's funny about messing with my friends though."

The accusation definitely captured his attention.

"This should be interesting."

He smirked and clasped his hands together, leaning forward. I leaned forward too.

"I wanna know what's up with you and James," I demanded, eyes narrowed in a threatening manner. Well, as threatening as I could get.

"He simply found a friend in me when there was no one else," the bombastic actor replied coolly, leaning back into the seat. "No one has been helping, you know?"

"You may be a mediocre actor—at best—but you're an appalling liar."

He cocked an eyebrow. "And you're an even worse friend. You don't know about his ongoing internal warfare, do you? No, because you failed to serve as a good friend."

_Whoa, did he just make a complex sentence? _

"I'm sorry?"

"You should be," he furthered, now _really_ perturbing me, acting like a fucking know-it-all. "No one has been there for him. No one has even known what's going on in his head. He's sick, and it's nice to know none of his friends care."

"I-I care!" I stammered, feeling defensive. I knew Jett fed off of my annoyance and anger, but I was starting to get defensive anyways.

"Do you?"

Jett was the perfect example of a manipulative deceiver. He was so convincing it scared me. He was a great liar, but I didn't want to give him that satisfaction.

"Look, just stay away from James, okay? I know you're up to something, and if you hurt James, I will not hesitate to hospitalize you. _Understood?_"

"I'm just trying to be a good friend," Jett scoffed.

Obviously my threat had gone in one ear and out the other.

"Right," I sardonically retorted as I pushed my chair back and readied myself to leave the shop.

"Man what's with everyone today? First Kendall, now you."

Record scratch.

"Hold up, _Kendall Knight_?"

I guess I screamed that out, because people turned their heads to send me a weird look.

The blue-eyed actor nodded. "Yeah. He called me like ten minutes ago asking me if we could talk."

Odd. Extremely odd. Kendall? He took my advice?

"Good luck with that," I simply said and fled the scene, extremely jubilant to be out of Jett's presence.

* * *

><p><span>Kendall's P.o.V.<span>

"Take a seat," I grunted, directing him to the sofa as I sat across from him.

"Thanks. Nice apartment, I guess."

"Yeah, yeah, that's peachy keen. I'm going to be blunt here. I've heard that you're friends with James now, and I'm not okay with that."

From the look on the bastard's face, I knew he was finding amusement in all of this.

"Jealous?" he sang, a smug smile painted on his face.

I felt my cheeks burn and I looked away, scowling.

"No, it's just… I don't trust you okay?" I huffed.

"Kendall, I know about you and James okay? You still like him, don't you?"

I didn't answer until a long time. Well, it seemed like a long time to me. "I hate him."

He chuckled lightly. "Do you now?"

"This isn't your business, so stay out of it!" I snapped, coming out angrier than I had intended.

"I know we haven't been the best of friends, but I've changed Kendall. Regardless of whether you believe it or not, I've changed. I'm not the same person I was. Just give me a chance to prove it."

Was Stetson actually begging me to trust him?

"Um… I don't really know what to say."

"Say you'll let me help! I can be there for you if you need someone to talk. I know you still have feelings, and I know you're probably having some issues dealing. I know you want to hate him so badly but you can't. I can see it in your eyes."

I glanced at him, a bit taken aback. I almost believed him. Almost. I shook my head and stood up.

"You should leave. Just leave James alone. Don't fuck with him," I said through gritted teeth and led him to the door.

Before he left, he turned around and looked me directly in the eyes.

"I _have_ changed, Kendall. Just… you have my number right? Give me a call if you're having any issues."

I muttered something and closed the door. I fell back onto the sofa and ran a hand through my blonde hair, closing my eyes as my brain worked endlessly to decipher Jett's words. Half of me was convinced while the other half was doubtful and reluctant to trust him. I mean, I do need someone to talk about my issues with… But, am I really willing to take his word?

* * *

><p><strong>PREDICT WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN NEXT. ;D<br>I kinda want to see what people think.  
>Do you think Kendall's gonna pour his heart out to Jett? What do you think Jett is up to? Nothing or what? Are they just being paranoid?<br>FEAR NOT! You shall discover soon!  
>The end is probably nearing in a few chapters... <strong>


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